Today we are talking about the state of excitedness that you have, the challenges you have, and the state that it puts you. We’re talking about how we can cultivate that and how it’ll change the way you can show up for your business, for clients, and in general. And, how it changes the stories that are going on in your head and changes the way you do things.
How your state affects your results
I was listening to an incredible podcast the other day, one of my favourite mentors, Jonathan Fields on the Good Life Project Podcast. He was interviewing Todd Herman and it was extraordinary to understand the inner workings of people who are at the top of their game, the top 2% of people who are Olympic champions, running races, CEOs, and other people who are at the very top of their game.
They talked about how to actually change the state that you’re in, especially if you’re having a bad day, or f you’ve been telling yourselves stories of failure and how something didn’t turn out last time.
He talked about the notion of taking on an “alter-ego” personality, like of a superhero or heroine type of personality, that would get you through it. Part of it is using your imagination and visualisation and whatever it takes to get you through it, will get you through it.
He has an amazing new book that’s out specifically about that but it started me thinking about how changing our state changes the way that we show up.
For instance, when I was writing my first book at the beginning, I was so pumped and excited about it that it just kind of flowed through me because I was in an excited state. I had convinced myself how much this was going to be so valuable to people, my bigger why was in there, there was a whole bunch of stuff. But then towards the end of writing my book, it felt like a slog. I had to get up in the mornings and do my 500 words and then I had to do the edits.
The state that I did that with really changed the way that I showed up. I wasn’t getting the same amount of words out. the results weren’t the same, my marketing was different. When I was coming from that state, it perpetuated a story that was going on in my head which went around in this big spiral
For those of you who are in those states, I really wanted to start up the conversation. And this IS a conversation!
I’d love for you to interact in this conversation in the comments, tell me about what helps you change your state?
The things we tell others to do, are the things WE need to do the most
I have learned over the years that often, what we tell others to do is often the thing that WE need the most.
As practitioners, it’s very likely we’re going to be in situations where we’re giving other people advice or directions about how they need to change their state and ideas on to do that.
When I was a practitioner helping people with burnout, and being a person with burnout myself, I realised that the thing in your life that really uplift you, that you really feel with your senses and in your belly, that give you a level of excitement that you don’t get from anything else – I used to call it your in-joyment (not enjoyment).
Where do you feel joy?
If you’ve forgotten what it is, it’s time to explore it.
What places, physical spaces, and experiences bring you a feeling of joy?
When I used to ask this question of people who were in burnout or were mums who would put everybody else first, it was really hard to answer that question. It’s a really important question to ask because, unless you are asking it and have an awareness about it, you’re not even going to explore it and it’s not even going to be on your radar.
It can be really disillusioning when you are by yourself in an office space and you don’t have clients coming in. You forget your joy and then you have to go home and do all of the home stuff only to get to work to try and get the money to pay for all of the things. I’ve been there. In between home and work, there’s this level of joy that kind of dips.
How can we create a state to shift and change?
One of my favourite questions to ask is, “What five things bring you joy?”
If you can’t come up with five, just write down one. Then start to ruminate over what other things bring you joy.
I know from treating thousands of clients with this same thing and mentoring thousands of practitioners, the same three things come up more frequently than others.
Time away (aka new environments)
One of the things that bring people joy is time out.
Arianna Huffington talks about this in her book Thrive, about having a “third space.” There’s work, there’s home, and then there’s this third space.
That third space for you might be a family trip away every year. Or if the family side of things gives you stress, it might actually be a trip away for yourself. Travel and having a space that isn’t those is one of the most extraordinary things that you can experience.
If travelling is too far when it comes to changing this state in which you look at the world and how you show up, maybe it is just having a third space in your environment. So you might have a third space such as a little courtyard or some other space other that is separate from your home and work spaces. It could be a gym, a local park, or somewhere else that you feel joy and it changes the way that you think and changes the way that you feel on the inside.
If I want to get all naturopathic on you and biochemical, those feelings of enjoyment are going to increase your endorphins and other neurotransmitters that you want to feel really good with and juiced up with, and that’s going to create a new neural pathway.
Creating new neural pathways opens up opportunities to think differently, innovatively, and creatively. Things can come through you when you change your state.
If you want to talk physics, the same thing happens if you’re changing your state from ice to water to steam. You’re jiggling things up a little bit. It’s not the same state that it’s always been. If we want to keep ice the way it is, then we keep it in the freezer at exactly the same temperature and it won’t change.
But if we want to change its state, we jiggle it up a little bit and create it into a different environment. Then all of a sudden it melts and turns into water and has very different properties. Once that happens, it can do different things than when it was ice. If we really want to heat it right, we end up having these excited molecules that run around everywhere and that is steam.
Our cells and energy are the same. We wonder why we feel stuck when we’re sitting at home or in our office doing the same things all the time. We wonder how things are going to change when it comes to:
- marketing ourselves
- figuring out that MailChimp thing
- changing the way we are doing things so that more people come in to see us
We’re stuck in the same way that we’ve always done things physically, emotionally, mentally, and otherwise.
One of the top ways to change your state is having a third space.
Nature
An amazing place to change your state is an environment with nature involved.
If you guys have done my Scavenger Hunt, you might have had a little taste of that by having plants around. That’s like a micro version of having a different state. It’ll change the way that the atoms are moving around.
What are your places and spaces that change your state? Maybe it’s:
- the beach
- camping in the bush
- standing on mountains
- snorkelling near the reef
I’ve had people talk about being in the ocean. Once you’re submerged in a wave that hasn’t completely dumped you, it changes your state. I hear that surfing is one of the biggest experiences that you can have to have a third space and nature all wrapped up in one and to be at one with that really changes your state.
I talked about travel and it’s one of mine, for sure. It changes the way I think and I creatively come up with new ideas. I’ll often come up with ideas for books, projects, or other things when I’m on an aeroplane.
Of course, we can create sanctuaries or environments that change our state for us. We can create environments that are full of the things that make us feel at ease, which really changes the way our nervous systems show up. So instead of being freaked out or stuck like an ice brick all the time, we can really help or hinder the way that we show up through the state that we are. Something as simple as having a bath can help change your state.
I love having a bath. It was one of the biggest game changers for me to have five baths a week. It sounds indulgent but that was the thing I needed to be able to experience what it felt like to change my state.
This is an exploration of how you are changing your state, the way you think, and the way that you feel so that you get a different result. Maybe for you, it is connecting with your puppy dog or other fur babies, or some other connection with nature.
Who you spend time with
The third most frequent answer I get to this question is about who you spend time with.
We’ve all had the most amazing magical holidays with our families and that we look back on and think, “Wow!” But then we go on another holiday and realise we might have been looking through rose-coloured glasses about that. Overall, we have these great memories but those moments, depending on who you are spending the time with, will change your state. All of us love our families but at the same time, we can have some really challenging times with the people who are closest to us.
One of the ways that I changed my state around business and the way that I deal with projects and other things is to hang out with my business besties. I just got off the phone with Denise Duffield-Thomas and she was talking about one of her game changers was to really connect with business besties – people who are on the same wavelength. This is something that is super important to me because I’m a relater, a communicator, and a connector. So the people that I surround myself with can change my state.
It’s very likely you’ve had people in your life, friends who just have a different worldview. They just want to focus in on things that might not be as valuable to talk about at the time, aren’t as inspiring, or don’t challenge the way we think. We see it all the time with our clients. The ones who don’t get the results they want is often because the people in their households aren’t on board with changes. Having people around who are just perpetuating lack or an old way of thinking is going to make it much more challenging to get a good result.
The same thing happens for us in business. When you’re surrounded by people who are just saying “Go get another job,” or “When are you going to give up on your ideas?” it’s really going to change the result you get. Versus having people around who are totally get where you’re at and tell you that it sucks right now but it’ll be different eventually.
You want the kind of people who will challenge you to think about your issues in different ways. Having a worldview and a mind shift because of the people around you reflecting stuff back at you, can be one of the easiest ways to change your state.
Other options
So we’ve talked about having time away, new environments, a third space, interacting with nature, and changing who you spend time with.
Other things that can help you change your state might include:
- art
- being creative
- music
- aromatherapy
- being around high vibe people
- yoga
- breathing
- listening to an inspiring podcast
- hiking
- sports
- and many more
Why does this matter?
The reason I’m talking about this state thing is that it is super easy in the journey of being a natupreneur to get into a state of lack. With everything that’s happening in our environment and our profession at the moment, it is really easy to get stuck.
It’s totally okay to get stuck. The journey that we have is such a long one as a practitioner and a business owner that you will – you’ll have moments of getting stuck in a rut. But the key, the game changer is to find the things that shift your state, nervous system, cells, and biochemistry, because through that, new things can come through – new ideas, new ways of being, new creativity and connections.
When you get stuck, you want to change that state so you can really truly shift, think about things differently for your business, and discover a new direction for what you want to create this year.
Take action
If you are exploring what it looks like to change your state, I’d love for you guys to take action. Try something you haven’t tried before and see how it feels. This is the cool thing – you can try something and decide it’s not for you.
Last year, I had coffee for the first time (can you imagine me on coffee all the time? I don’t need it). I’d never been interested in it before, but I tried it last year. Sometimes I like the feeling and it changes my state. But other times the state change that it creates isn’t something I like. But I didn’t know until I tried it.
In those moments when it gets tough, when you are tired, in those moments when you’re not quite sure how to push through, consider the conversation we had today. Notice where you can get out into nature even when you don’t think you have enough time or energy. Notice where you might be missing a third space. Realise if you haven’t been travelling. Pay attention to who you’ve been hanging around.
See if that information helps you understand where your state comes from and what you can choose to change.
Please share
If this has given you a little bit of insight or a gold nugget or an A-ha! moment, please share it with somebody who you think could benefit. Subscribe on YouTube or follow me on Facebook so you don’t miss out on future trainings.
Hugs,
Tammy.
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